Impatient

I don’t often write words in this space… I prefer to let my pictures do the talking. I’m not sure I have anything new to say and there sure are a lot of words out there these days. Tonight, however, I have a lot on my heart. We are waiting for our travel approval – any day, we’ll get the email inviting us to travel to pick up our son! Our adoption journey has not been what it is for a lot – we only started last July. We will likely travel in a few weeks, which means we will meet our son after 10 months beginning this journey. Since we were matched quickly and before we were logged in to China’s system, the wait has felt longer as we’ve watched Seth grow. The first picture I saw of him, he was 6 months old. I got used to that, and we got an update and he was a year! 6 months to a year is a significant change… I got used to him at a year, starting to walk, pulling up on things, playing with toys. Now our last update and he’s nearly 17 months – he’s not a baby anymore! He’s walking well and so curious… and he’s smiling. But, we’ve missed out on those months of his life – and in the life of a small child they are significant. I can’t begin to tell you how amazing it is that ICC, the nonprofit, is in his orphanage. I am so thankful for this answer to prayer that I didn’t even know to pray! I know he is being loved on and cared for.

I have recently “watched” via Facebook several kids have open heart surgery. Some kids have had major surgery and been discharged within a week, others are still slowly recovering after nearly 3 months post surgery, and another just had a hero’s heart placed in her chest – her heart had gone into failure after living in China for 7 years without treatment. She waited for 3 years to get a heart perfect for her body, and grace abounded and she’s doing exceptionally well. This heart is indeed perfect for her. Through the loss of a life, she has gained a new life. And it astounds me that this cardio thoracic surgeon held her failing heart in his hands, took it out of her body and a machine continued to keep her body alive without a heart. And then he took someone else’s heart out of a cooler and put it in her body. He HELD IT IN HIS HANDS. He reconnected it to her valves and arteries and it started pumping again. How amazing is that?! How utterly astounding are the intricacies of the human body that it can overcome so much. This sweet girl never gave up hope, all those years in China. And a family did come for her – and she was labeled terminal, but they never gave up hope. And she went into heart failure, for three years. But she kept living life – never giving up hope. We may live in the fallen aftermath of sin, but God has been so gracious and merciful to allow us to experience such glimpses of heaven and redemption, even in this fallen state.

Will you please pray for Seth? I am praying that somehow his little heart will know that we are coming for him. Such change is coming, and he has such little knowledge of it. He will grieve more losses – he has already endured so much. I wonder if his curiosity at other adoptive parents who have visited his orphanage is simply his curiosity or does he recognize in his little brain that they kind of look like the pictures I sent of our family? Does he somehow know that we are coming for him?

WIll you please pray for my heart and my kids? Two and a half weeks is a long time to be away. Especially for my littles… Alex is very much my baby and it’s not going to be easy. I am praying for a peace that passes all understanding. While I should be anxious, I want to rest in the knowledge of His protection and grace – and I’m leaving my kids with the best grandparents in the world! I do really want to enjoy this trip – to revel in Seth’s country and enjoy the adventure with my husband by my side. This will be a precious two weeks where he will be our only child – concentrated one on one time that will look very different once we get home. I want to make the most of it and not be pining for home the entire time.

Counting down the days!

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